W Is for Writers’ Block Be Gone & (finishing) What I Started

It is the first of June, at 4:15 a.m. and I am sitting in my mother’s dining room in Southern California.   I cannot seem to quiet my brain.  I’ve been here since Saturday this time around, in order to be of assistance as I watch her go through the changes that age brings.

When I am under an incredible amount of stress, I find it  difficult for me to sleep…and to write.  I’ve mentioned before that I tend to withdraw when I feel vulnerable.  Of course, staying focused is nearly impossible.

The writing challenge for May was Z to A in May.  I finished three letters–Z, Y, and X–and, because I try to write purposefully and genuinely, it did not come without some passionate disagreement from readers.  I think it took me by surprise…not because there was disagreement, but at some of the accusations thrown, which left me feeling particularly vulnerable. It is a true lesson for me as I challenge my crazy notion that others see discourse in the same way I do or want to debate in the manner of good philosophical styling.

Taking on this particular challenge has not been easy on many levels.  Z to A, feeling vulnerable, and also learning to deal with the challenge of facing issues of my aging mother, the heartache that accompanies it, and my own mortality.

I must also face my own issues of wanting to retreat to protect myself from pain.  Writing is a way for me to be able to share these life’s challenges.

So, even though it is now the first day of June, and the Z to A in May challenge is over, I will finish this challenge. Writers’ block will be nothing more than one more letter…my W entry.

And I will continue to be genuine, though perhaps not always purposeful.  I may play devil’s advocate from time-to-time.  I may also not be quite so well-liked because of my ideas or may not feel comfortable with commentary. I cannot allow the challenges of life interfere with what I want for myself, what I start and finish, or what or how I write.

It may take me a few months, but I will finish my Z to A challenge…writers’ block, be gone!



2 thoughts on “W Is for Writers’ Block Be Gone & (finishing) What I Started

  1. Cynthia Griffin

    I am in a similar situation. My mother is under Hospice care and is growing weaker. Luckily, we live just down the road from her and with the help of Hospice, and private home healthcare, we are able to keep her in her home and be there for her as well. It must be difficult to deal with this when it takes you from your daily life. Don’t worry about the writing. It will come and when it does, you will have that much more insight and depth to put into it. My heart and prayers are with you…keep me posted.

  2. catchats

    You are going through such a tough time, Coral so don’t be too hard on yourself. I think it’s great you want to finish the challenge. I hope it provides a good outlet to express your emotions and vent a little. Take care. It’s not easy to do what you’re doing. I commend you.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s